A prenuptial agreement can be a method of protecting your assets from your spouse in case your marriage ends in divorce. Some people who are engaged have a moral issue with asking their to-be spouse to sign an agreement that prevents them from acquiring assets that their spouse obtained prior to marriage.
They fear that their to-be spouse will be offended and may leave them because they’re supposed to share everything in a marriage. But what if one of the spouses obtained vast wealth prior to marriage and wants to protect it? With today’s high divorce rate, a prenup shouldn’t be a big deal, right?
A Prenup isn’t Bulletproof
Even if you have a signed prenup, keep in mind that it may not protect your assets. A judge can overturn an agreement if he/she feels that it is one-sided and unreasonable to the spouse who agreed to sign it. If a prenuptial agreement doesn’t fully protect your assets, then what is the solution? To prevent risking your assets, you’ll have to avoid marriage and cohabitation.
Cohabitation laws vary regionally. But if you live with a partner for a certain period, they may be entitled to your possessions after a break-up. If you want to get married or live with a partner, you have to accept the risk that you may lose some or all of your assets if the two of you part ways.
Moral Dilemma
Having the conversation with the person you’re going to marry about not entitling them to assets you obtained prior to marriage can be awkward. But it must be done if you want to have a document that may protect your assets in the event of a divorce.
As for the moral dilemma that you may face, find solace in knowing that you acquired those assets before marriage, without the help of your to-be spouse. Your partner should understand that if they are marrying you for love. If they have an ulterior motive for marrying you, your request for a prenup may be met with hostility.
Ask yourself if your to-be spouse has the right to ownership of the assets you acquired before marrying them. If the answer is ‘no’, you shouldn’t be in a moral dilemma.
A prenup is especially necessary when one of the spouses has a significantly higher net worth than the other. Imagine being worth millions of dollars prior to marriage and then marrying someone making minimum wage and possibly losing half or more of your wealth in the name of love. Does that make sense?
High Risk, Low Reward
Not having a signed prenup, especially if your net worth is significantly higher than your to-be spouse’s, is a high-risk scenario that offers very little reward. You’re staking your wealth for the sake of satisfying your partner. Keeping your spouse happy is important, but it must be done within reason. Is it reasonable for your spouse to demand co-ownership of the assets that you obtained without him/her?
As for the assets that you obtained while married, that’s a different story. Your spouse could argue that he/she provided support in areas other than work that enabled you to have time and other resources to generate an income. That’s a plausible argument.
If you decide to get married without a prenuptial agreement, you have nobody to blame, but yourself, if you lose some or all of your assets in the event of a divorce. Many wealthy men and women have lost a substantial amount of money in a divorce because they didn’t have a prenuptial agreement. And I’m talking about the 1% of people.
If you think that your spouse loves you and will never leave you because you’re an elite member of society, just remember that Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos and Bill Gates are divorced. It seems that no amount of money is enough for you to have if your spouse wants to leave you.
The Divorce
The person you marry is not the person you divorce. That’s an important distinction to make. While you’re married and on good terms with your spouse, it may be difficult to believe that they will do anything to jeopardize your resources.
During the divorce, your ex-spouse may be bitter and feel that he/she deserves, at least, half of your wealth because they were with you. Whether you feel that’s unjust or not won’t matter. A judge will decide if your ex-spouse is entitled to your assets and the amount.
Since your spouse is leaving you and may feel betrayed by you, he/she is going to look to get the optimal reward. Don’t be surprised if your ex-spouse is vindictive and unrecognisable at the negotiation table.
Wanting a prenup may seem like you’re preparing for the marriage to fail. But you shouldn’t look at it like that. It may protect your assets. You don’t want a tornado to demolish your house, but you have house insurance in case it happens. There is no guarantee that any marriage will survive, but the chances are high that you may lose some of your assets in a divorce if you don’t have a prenuptial agreement.
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